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This Just In: World Hates Us

This non-revelation appears in The Independent (U.K.):

If the human race as a whole, rather than 50 states plus the District of Colombia, could cast a ballot this coming November, John Kerry would surely win the presidency by a landslide.

Uh, thanks for sharing. If the human race as a whole ran the USA, the products of our labor would be stripped from us and redistributed to the undemocratically elected governments of the rest of the planet. Which, as near as I can tell, is the primary goal of the United Nations.

You know what, rest-of-the-world? It was your lousy attitude that made our ancestors decide to come over here in the first place. You goofed. Now get over it.

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